


Next Time

by Filliam



Category: Sword Art Online (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-09
Updated: 2019-04-09
Packaged: 2020-01-07 11:00:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18409268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Filliam/pseuds/Filliam
Summary: Shino visits Keiko in a snowy day. Someone has to open up so the other can, too.





	Next Time

**Author's Note:**

> Made for SAO Pride Week - Day 2: Trust. Another old WIP I finished up and polished a bit for this. Pretty sure Silicon is a rarepair, but oh well, I had fun with this anyway. 
> 
> I started shipping Silicon because of a message someone once sent to my SAO blog, and I got interested in their potential dynamic ever since. The way I see it, Sinon's tendency seems to close others off, while Silica is character that tries to reach out to others despite having some internal conflict of her own - a side of her which she tries to hide. They just strike me as two characters who would be interesting to see interact, romantically or otherwise.
> 
> This one was particularly old, from way back when I was trying to figure out how I wanted to write Silica and Sinon's dynamic. The original attempt was made as a writing exercise with a friend.

* * *

It was snowing outside.

Keiko patted inside the tall kitchen cabinet and her fingertips gathered dust brushing against the wooden cover. Feeling the cold metal surface of the can she looked for, she grabbed it and closed the door. Following into the next room, she was greeted by a small, fluffy creature that rubbed itself against her legs and purred softly.

“Are you really being affectionate or is it just the food?” She asked her cat and almost expected an answer.

She unsealed the can with the jagged opener, sneering at the unpleasant smell oozing from the container. She dumped the wet contents on the tiny bowl that read “Pina”. The feline’s ears bristled upwards as it gracefully walked to the pot, stuffing its face with the kind of gross-looking food.

 _There’s my answer_ , she thought.

Crouching, she caressed her pet’s head, a sigh of defeat escaping her mouth.

“You really are the worst kitty ever, you know?”

The cat continued to munch on the contents of the bowl, unfazed by her accusations. Stepping into the next room and slouching on the sofa in the living room, she stared at the ceiling for a while.

A few hours earlier, her parents had once again invited her to a family gathering, and once again, she’d refused.

She hated seeing her family. They asked too many questions about her time in the floating castle, too many inquiries of years she’d rather forget. She loathed seeing her relatives and the judging stares that they directed at her, and no amount of scolding about “her growing reputation as a shut-in” could change that or convince her to go.

Unsavory thoughts of her time in Aincrad swirled in her mind, but she quickly swatted them away. Letting those feelings fester for too long tended to give her headaches, and that wasn’t the time for–

The doorbell rang.

Her heart skipped a beat. She knew who stood behind the door – they were expected, after all, and there weren’t many people who would visit her dormitory, especially at this hour.

She walked to the door, somewhat anxious. Looking through the peephole, she saw the distorted image of a girl, her black hair tied with white ribbons on both sides of her face. The girl behind the door rubbed her palms together, hands bumping into her half-rimmed glasses as white smoke released from her mouth. The harsh December winter bit into her, leggings and coats and all, and it didn’t seem like the snowfall outside would stop any time soon.

Keiko opened the door, the cold wind sending the hairs of her nape on end. Some warmth from the house’s heater escaped through the entrance. Keiko, whose pigtails were so customary both in the real and in the virtual world they could as well be her trademark, wore her hair down, which gave her a slightly more mature air than her usual juvenile looks. The one-size-too-large sweater featuring a cartoonish goldfish over her chest seemed to act as a proper counterweight to that, though.

She couldn’t help but notice how comically burly Shino looked in her three-- four? layers of clothing. Her wool muffler hid the lower half of her face and she looked like a human spring roll.

Waving a hand, the visitor greeted: “Hello, Silica.”

“Come on in, Sinon,” the shorter girl replied with a smile, and Shino obliged.

The two picked up the nasty habit of calling each other by their avatar names in real life, but at that point, they just couldn’t help it. Their time together in the virtual world made these sound much more natural to say out loud.

Closing the door after entering the house, Shino untied the muffler around her neck and placed it on the makeshift hanger by the entrance, along with her coat. Keiko went ahead to the kitchen to start heating the tea. Taking off her boots before stepping into the hallway, a noise similar to a softly revving engine distracted the bespectacled girl.

As she saw Keiko awkwardly shooing the cat away from the kitchen, she realized the source of the noise.

“Oh.”

Slowly and warily, the furry source made its way to her.

Shino stood still, watching as the cat circled around her once, then brushed its white fur against her black leggings the second time around. She felt a mix of confusion and joy from the unexpected greeter.

**

Shino’s call earlier was a bit sudden.

“Is it okay if I visit you today?”

That was her simple request upon calling. Keiko had invited her to her house once before, and had no reason to decline, but she couldn’t help but notice something off about Shino’s voice; her tired tone, the light rasping, the subtle panic embedded into it.

“Are you alright?” she’d asked.

A weak “yeah” succeeding a short pause was all Shino said. Keiko didn’t push her.

Shino often felt a bit distant, like she’d prefer biting her own tongue off to opening up. A past of hurt had forced her to build walls around herself. Keiko didn’t know how to convey that desire, or even if it was her place to do so…

But she wanted to tear those walls down.

**

“Sorry for the wait,” Keiko said, entering the room.

She quickly directed her gaze down to the creature resting on Shino’s lap.

“It’s okay,” Shino deadpanned, pointing at Pina. “This little guy kept me company.”

Keiko wasn’t able to hold back the sheepish chuckles that escaped her mouth. Shino squinted at the sudden laughter.

“Sorry, sorry,” Keiko replied, shaking her head side to side. “You just said that so seriously!”

Shino scratched her cheek at the odd explanation, the hint of a smile making a way to her lips.

“I’m surprised, too. He generally doesn’t just approach people like that.”

As if on cue, the cat ran away from Shino’s leg pillow, darting back to the kitchen. At that, Keiko again seemed oddly amused, trying to hold back her joy at that simple event.

It wasn’t uncommon for Keiko to laugh at seemingly trivial matters, and albeit she’d never admit, the dark-haired girl found joy in being accidentally amusing in this way. She never found humor to be her forte. Keiko’s promptness for laughter seemed twofold whenever Shino was around – not that the girl knew that, obviously. She just assumed that was part of Keiko’s constantly cheery personality.

Finally setting the tray on the kotatsu, Keiko sat beside Shino, a tinge of nervousness prickling them both as she did so.

The guest took hold of the cup before her, warm ceramic heating cold hands, the lemony smell of honey revitalizing her body. She raised the drink to take a sip, feeling as the hot drink soothed her light shivering and a familiar taste stuck to her tongue.

The cup made a dull sound as it was gently set on the table, a tense silence filling the room for several seconds. Keiko was the one to break it.

“So, is everything okay with you? Anything you wanted to talk about?”

Shino averted her gaze down to her cup, inviting silence once more. She swirled the contents of her mug, avoiding eye contact as she thought on how to answer.

“Nothing in particular. You mentioned I should come visit a couple of weeks ago, and today just happened to be a good day for me. You said something about a movie last time I was here?”

“Ah, I see! That uh, that makes sense.”

Her voice seemed clearer than during her call, but something still seemed off. Failing at getting a read on her again, Keiko pursed her lips.

Maybe this is none of her business. Maybe she should just watch a movie with her friend, and stop being so nosy…

Unsure or whether or not to push further, she took the laptop by the side of the table and opened it, both of them staring at the screen as Keiko tried to remember the name of a movie she mentioned in passing weeks ago.

It might be how long it’s been, or that she only brought it up because she wanted to watch it with the girl next to her, or, perhaps more likely, how worried she is about her friend right now, but she struggles with the name.

Catching a whiff of the scent of the tea again, she remembers – both the name of the movie and something else.

“You know,” Keiko started as she began her typing, “I have trouble sleeping sometimes. Nightmares.”

Shino turned back to her, shoulders instinctively tensing upon seeing Keiko’s melancholic smile.

“Ever since I had to leave home and come to Tokyo, well, I was– am, a bit scared. I barely left the house back then, and then the SAO incident happened, and then, just when I thought things would be normal again… The only school that would accept me was hours from home, and I had to move here by myself, away from my family, and they blame _me_ for it, somehow.”

She said that with a cheery expression, along with a cracked voice that unmasked her grief.

Keiko knows this is a bit sudden, and maybe somewhat awkward, but she doesn’t know how else to get through to her.

Shino stared at her speechless for a second before nodding, prompting her to continue.

"And so every night since, I feel this… _guilt_  that makes me want to hurl,” she continued, clasping her hands in a cute, unfitting way.

Shino felt an urge to reach out to the girl next to her to comfort her, but something inside herself stopped her, wouldn’t let her. She simply clenched her fists.

“But,“ Keiko continued, “you told me about this blend of tea, a couple of months ago, I think? And I know this is silly, but ever since I started trying it a while before bed it’s been better.”

Shino wore a puzzled expression hearing this. Keiko continued, a bit fidgety.

“Uh, well, not a lot better? Just not as bad! I mean, it’s just tea. And I mean, I know this is silly,” she stammered, “but I guess it helped. Tea sounds like one of those silly things people who don’t really… _get it_  recommend, but there was something about it, small as it was, that helped me shuffle a little less in my sleep. So,” she sounded a bit embarrassed saying the last part, “it’s like you helped me, in a way.”

Keiko put her hand over Shino’s, amber eyes uncharacteristically piercing as she stared the sniper down, a firm, reassuring squeeze draped over Shino’s knuckles.

“Now, I get the feeling you asked to come here for a reason. Because you had something troubling you.”

A short silence followed, and Shino just stared, perhaps a little more stoic than intended.

“… And I guess, I want to help you, too?”

She thought it was a bit embarrassing making her comfort pitch following a talk about the magical wonders of tea for anxiety, but at the same time she couldn't think of anything better to say. She just figured opening up first would be the best route there.

Keiko started fumbling, scratching her neck awkwardly.

"W-well, not that it’s uh, my place to say any of that, or like you have to talk to me about anything! I’m just rambling here, really! Haha!”

Shino laughed sheepishly as Keiko’s ears turn pink through her clarification, and a small _“it’s fine, it’s fine,”_ is all she said before going back to silence. Given a moment, she grasped Keiko’s hand in return, her calm voice breaking the silence.

“I get nightmares too,” she confessed. “And, honestly, I’m afraid of being alone with my thoughts for too long, being all by myself in my apartment.”  
  
She fiddled with her fingers a bit, as if to focus on something keep herself talking.

“I guess I just wanted to hear someone’s voice. Be with someone for a while. You were one of the first people who came to mind, really.”

Sinon thought back to a few months ago – before BoB, before meeting Kirito, before meeting Silica and his other friends, and she can’t imagine herself being so frank to someone like this. The fog in her mind that tried to close others off seemed thinner. Easier to navigate through, if only slightly.

Keiko wasn't quite sure how to react at first. She just squeezed the other girl’s hand tighter; to remind her that she’s there. She’s a little surprised Shino puts enough trust in her to tell her this – honored, in a way. She felt a prickling in her eyes that threatened to turn into tears, but she knew that wasn’t the time.

“I’m, I’m glad, that I can be a person like that for you. I understand how it can be, to feel like you can’t talk about these thoughts with anyone, but…”

She moves her face closer to Shino’s.

“… You don’t have to, you know. If you’re okay with me.”

Keiko took note of how smitten Shino’s gaze looked at her, and finally noticed their faces were almost touching. Both girls’ cheeks tinted with a faint red at that moment, hearts skipping the same beat.

Shino quickly averted her gaze from Keiko’s, who in turn chuckled at the display of bashfulness that seemed more and more common for the girl she once perceived as a cold markswoman.

A wandering hand reached out from behind Shino’s neck to her shoulder, gently pulling her closer to the girl sitting next to her. The warmth brought her a sense of tranquility.

“You don’t have to be so shy about those things next time, you know,” Keiko’s soft voice explained.

“I’ll keep that in mind… next time,” Shino replied warmly, the last part uttered with a certain longing to it. She playfully bumped her shoulder against Keiko’s.

Shino leaned in closer and laid her head against Keiko’s shoulder, making herself comfortable as they finally started the movie waiting on the nearby laptop’s screen.

They didn’t know how much time they had to be like that, hands interwoven under the heated table, cozily leaning onto each other. They did know that then, however, nothing could touch them – the swirling white cold dancing through the biting winter winds outside, the expectations of judging relatives, the foreboding loneliness of an empty apartment. That small dormitory, with its small laptop, was their bunker, offering them the chance to be together.

When they were together. Those were the moments they could allow their worries to melt away like driven snow.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to thegayfromrulid@tumblr for beta reading this.


End file.
